Sushma ! This name may be a normal name with for you or the word with its meaning. And to those who dont know its meaning readers its your job do search it .But when it comes to me the name itself is the synonymous word to friendship.
Lets read a story of mine no of ours . The story of Sushma and Pooja . I dont like to give the term best friend to us not even the non biological sister these terms are too maon stream these days ! But our friendship is not among those.
You are actually the friend I will remember when I am in problem or I am very happy .We have got the ugliest fight bt the craziest part is we could never deny the fact that we were too dependent on eachother . From not letting eachother talk with the boy we didnt like to taking revenge with back biters we have done all. From doing homework sitting in first bench to gossiping in last bench or doing others attendence ! Quite interesting quite naughty we be when we both be together !
I never had many friend nor I will bt among small number of friends you are among the special one …hahahaha eveyone is special because I have only half a dozen of friends… hahahahaa !
Eating too much of food and sharing the same plate or anything or taking those things with eachothers permissions or shouting or getting jealous seeing others being close to other ….I cherish every moments with you Sushmey. Dushmey!
You have always been there for me hope when you read for CA dont let those crapy things called books or other person you reside take my place . I know none can because I love me and I am the best ♥
Despite the fact that I will feel lonly you or some part of me would be missing I am very happy for you more than you aswell ♥ I wont wish anything but the best of all the luck and all the wishes of the world you stay happy and be CA (without getting any back)
Baby our room is too messy why dont you adrone room with curtains ! Please I am working . Mange the room aswell said my honey.
I was about to drape with curtains the view I saw was worth watching in full moon night with no other light. There was no noise in the city of noise ; no children playing nor any vechile moving just a couple not of man but of dog making love like none is watching ! Like thats their time of being one ! Like man eating food after 15 days of hunger so passionate so much of emotion could be seen ! You may see the lust in it but the way dog was biting its partner you could see how carefully it was doing !
I had question to myself *what is love *oh love …. seems to be easy right I felt the same at first instance then I had no answer ..I asked again and again what love !
I remembered I love momo (South asian food) I love momo because it helps me not to feel hungry ! Yes even other food do that so do I love all food no I love momo because it is makes me happy like no other.
So making happy love ?
Then I saw baby working there I love him ! Why I love him ! I love him because he makes me feel good when I am feeling low .He cares about me . He is really supportive . He sees me beautiful even in worn and torn clothes or messy hair .
Yes overall he makes me feel the best in the world
So making some feel best is love ?
I remembered mother ; sister ; brother ; dad (family) yes baby is family but they are with me from my birth or their birth !
I love them because they care for me they help me always or I can rely on them for anything.
In short I love them because they dont selfish when it comes to me
So not being selfish is love?
I even love myself .I love myself because only after my existence other things will matter . As an empty bottle cant pour anything I cant spread love if I dont lovemyself.
In other words I love myself to make other things matter
So doing anything to make other things matter is love ?
I saw my pet comming to my room I love it aswell . I love my house aswell because all these have feeling of belongliness .
I love books from my favourite author because it makes me feel good when I read them .
So feeling good is love .
I love this .
I love that.
So thats love ?
Isnt it vauge like the universe ! To me it is ! I couldnt even make single custom definition of love like many of people do make ! Love is actually too complex in its meaning beyond our imaginations . Seems to be very easy at the begining and again so complex to explain when we try to find its meaning . Probably thats the reason *I love you * is very common breakup is very normal mostly for teenagers ! May be they be in relationship thinking like me love is too easy and find it most difficult even difficult than remembering articles of different treaties or passing the finals of CA but its not impossible as we can see the examples of love within us ! Around us and beyond us !
I love my readers as wells 🙂 ♥
Congratulations ! We made it this year aswell. Four years have been mixture of happiness and sadness probably twin flavoured . How will a person feel when he or she realises s/he do have* the only gem found in entire world * you are that gem to me ! Every time I say I love you , you dont even let me complete the line and kiss me wrapping your hands around my waist. You bring me that close to you that you were never of yourselves . The gravity of attraction between you and me is much than the attraction of north amd south magnetic pole ♥
Yes, I love you ; I love the way you kiss me in the middle of the conversation in middle of the road or anything ! But the only thing I miss between us is the pressure ; tension we had when we met for the first time .I miss being touched unknowingly by you and then staring at you like I had current attack of high volt . I miss the gesture of mixed emotions of shy and curiosity about how it feels touching the most wanted person of my life . The person with whom i have imagined thousand of fantacies and dreamed of living life together.
That day you grabed my hair pulled me against your face I could even feel your breathe I thought you would kiss me .I was happy you made the first move I was so excited ; yes I was nervous aswell . It didnot take me a second to think I wish I had used mouth fresher I wish I brushed for longer time ….while I was busy with all this I was distracted with your daamhot voice which said
*Gajalu, I love you!*
Now I didnot know how to react I freed myself . Although I was happy to listen I love you from you, I would have been happier to get our first kiss in french style ! I wanted to hide that disappointed look and tried to fake a smile I could not . It was clearly visible in my face . Now the nervousness arised I was scared about your thinking towards me . She wants kisses . .. what you might of thought …..didnot you want to kiss me like other boyfriend do to their girlfriend. Again your voice brought me to real world beside you *see they are kissing eachother*
Me: every couple kiss
You: why not us ?
Me :(I could barely see him .I looked towards the couple not being able to see him .)
(had turned all red ; I was shivering a bit .) I dont know
He : Gajalu its fine if you are not comfortable
Me: (within myself I want you to kiss me why are you not kissing me common take a move ) *no reaction*
We didnot even had guts to talk ! The want of being kissed was driving me crazy
I pulled his jacket crossed my hands around his shoulders he was shocked probably .we could feel eacothers lips ! Our lips touching eachothers lips for the first time ! Slowly you kissed my lips again and again . How wont I ; I had never been second in anything ! We had the sense of love and competition between us who will kiss eachother more ! Suddenly I couldnot kiss his lips ( tasty one ) because his and my tongues were playing …………..we could taste eachother ……We were so much into eachother .kissing eachother like we wont have next day for that ! And we stopped I realised I had had my eyes closed ! We could not talk simply stared at eachother ! We were shy we were happy we wanted it more … we simply read eachothers face with so many emotions ! The tension we had of being liked or not how my breathe was ; wish of using the mouth fresher ; brushing for longer time . Eachothers reaction ! !!!!!!!!! ! And your words *you are a good kisser*
Today tommorrow or anyday I want us to kiss like we did that day with shy….. curiosity…. love ….. nervousness…… ….sexual tension …..many more..like a stranger who dont know how eachother taste .
please I need you ,be with me,I said with every possible ways . He was busy like the roads of kathmandu.No he was not the job holder nor he did too much of stuffs in home. he was average student with pending homeworks and limited pocket money.
How do student treat to study…the same he did to me . Students study when they have exams or nothing else to do . Exactly like he was with me when he had nothing to do or friendless or lonly.
Every time I wanted the support or someone to hold me encourage me motivate me or make me feel I needed the faith he was not there .Many times I complained ;cried,shouted,did every single creepy things but as always he blamed situation , bad time !
Cheers! I was not alone in any problem . I had hope with me every time he gave*to be with me from next time*. I know now next time never comes;something that comes is *this time *
The first post of mine starts on 1st January 2017! A good start because writing is something that makes me go crazy and feel so good .Probably better than those medicine on the shop . let’s me share you a secret even at the moment I am having comman cold which doesnot seemed to be that common 😑 running nose;low fever ;winter rain; cold winds and the cold hands and legs and some headache still its writing on the blog is making me feel as good as the hugs of your most favourite person 😍 😍
Too much emotions are filled seems like I don’t need food tonight! No ,I was joking! I am foodie I will eat too much much more than the stomach can resist .Maybe that’s the reason my stomach is furious with me and it has come out and none of my clothes fit in to me ! Yes ,quite frustrating and sad but every size is beautiful in itself like now I have gain not little but too much of weight still people admire saying cute ! its not the thing that people’s saying influence me regardless the fact that everyone loves to be admired ! I don’t know about boys but yes many of the girls do ! ✌
Lastly I want to say this is my first post here ! this is my new begining if you find me stay connected…….
many post on the way
regards to all the readers